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Summary: which Shepard calls Liara "Blueberry Muffin". Prompt: Femshep/Liara and sex over the phone ... the hologram functions on Normandy are temporarily broken down, so there's no visual, only heated words and "hello hand".
Length: 3800 words
Rating: M for... heated words.
Notes: I blame Lair of the Shadow Broker for this, but I actually started writing this long before it came out, which is why this is a world where Shepard has not installed LotSB yet doesn't get hold of the Shadow Broker intel until a few days after the mission.

Hello? )
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Summary: Shepard and Liara are having a baby. There are... complications. Sort of.
Length: 143 words
Rating: G
Notes: Crack. Written very quickly, and inspired by the title of a previous fill on the same subject.

All right, Liara. Push. )
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Summary: Renegade male Shepard/paragon femShep, with Tali and Garrus commentary. Inspired by this picture.
Length: 2000 words
Rating: R for not-so-explicit M/F sex
Notes: Crack.

Tali groaned and leaned her head in her hands, palms covering her visor. )
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Summary: Shepard and Liara have something sweet and romantic going. However, Shepard secretly gets off on fantasies where the things she does to Liara are anything but sweet and romantic.
Length: 2200 words
Rating: M for rough and explicit F/F sex
Notes: I don't write "rough" much. Too much of a wuss.

Liara is flirting with her. If you can call it that. )
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Summary: Shepard gets caught in Hock's room while looking for DNA samples, and the only way out is seducing him... and taking the DNA in a more direct manner.
Length: 4100 words
Rating: M for explicit M/F sex
Notes: I am so proud of this fic! And when I say "proud", I mean "horribly embarrassed". Still, it probably has the best title I have ever come up with.

Come to think of it, Commander Shepard thought, checking the alarm clock for DNA had probably not been the cleverest idea to pass through her head. )
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Summary: Prompt: "'I love this rifle!' And so does Shepard. So... FemShep x Garrus' Sniper Rifle, anyone?" In the end, it's more Garrus/Shepard/Rifle, though...
Length: 2400 words
Rating: M for... inappropriate and probably unsafe use of firearms? Also sex.
Notes: Don't try this at home.

Forty, she stated as the mech fell over backwards and then, almost as an afterthought, exploded. )
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Summary: Prompt: "Shepard femdom. Shepard has a male character (Garrus, Thane, Saren, Nihlus, etc, just no Jacob or Kaidan, please) tied up and is playing with him."
Length: 189 words
Rating: M for implied rape
Notes: OMG rape is funny! Am I cool and edgy yet? :(

The ball-gag was a nice touch. )
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Summary: Shepard fucking Kaidan with a strap-on. He is less than thrilled with the idea at first, but eventually warms to it.
Length: 3700 words
Rating: M for explicit M/F sex
Notes: It took me a week to write, and as a result, I'm afraid the end result may feel a bit disjointed. I still think it's a fun idea, though.

There's no way I can get you to change your mind on this, is there, Commander? )
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Summary: After a request for "slow and tender sex". Shepard and Garrus finally have their special moment together, but kill the mood when a careless remark reminds them of what they were trying to forget.
Length: 2100 words
Rating: R for rather tame descriptions of M/F sex
Notes: The ending just kind of happened. I don't think the abruptness of it went over well, but it felt kind of realistic, so I decided to keep it...

Chafing was not an issue. )
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Summary: There was a request for "masturbating Jacob" fic. This is one of those. Also, Miranda/f!Shepard and Miranda/f!Shep/Jacob, in Jacob's dreams.
Length: 1300 words
Rating: M for explicit F/F and M/F/F sex
Notes: Written very quickly. Not too sure about this one...

The alarm did not go off, and Jacob grunted, rolled over and hit his clock with a balled-up fist. )
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Summary: Liara in her office, masturbating to a picture (and thoughts) of femshep.
Length: 1800 words
Rating: M for explicit F/F sex
Notes: I feel like this fic makes me appreciate Liara more, for some reason...

The picture had spent its first few weeks on her desk.  )
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Summary: Kaidan/Shepard, after a request for "sleepy, just woke up sex". Kind of disturbingly fluffy.
Length: 1000 words
Rating: Barely R for really tame descriptions of M/F sex
Notes: Shepard is still nameless and faceless. It's kind of funny.

They fell asleep holding each other. )
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Summary: Kelly watches Shepard and Garrus having wild, wacky interspecies sex through a security camera and is very... excited about it.
Length: 2500 words
Rating: M for explicit M/F sex (and Kelly masturbating to it)
Notes: I decided to just bullshit my way through that pesky "turian anatomy" problem this time. Writing Kelly is surprisingly entertaining; I'm really going to have to pay more attention to her next time through ME2.

When you think about it, it makes plenty of sense that there would be condoms for turians. )
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Summary: After returning from the Omega 4 relay, Shepard pays a visit to Liara, alone. This results in biotic-assisted lesbian sex. Liara tops, sort of.
Length: 1400 words
Rating: M for explicit F/F sex
Notes: I like seeing characters with special powers use those powers. (...and not just for sex, either.)

Liara used to be so... small. Soft-spoken. Shy. She misses the person Liara used to be, just a little. )
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Summary: Femshep is captured on Purgatory. Who is willing to pay so much that they were willing to risk capturing a spectre and what do they intend to do with her?
Length: 200 words
Rating: G
Notes: Just something short and silly.

You better explain yourself extremely quickly! )
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Summary: Shepard and Garrus have some fun with Garrus' old C-Sec handcuffs. Established relationship, fully consensual, fluffy and rather tame smut.
Length: 1200 words
Rating: R for rather tame M/F sex and bondage
Notes: Kind of awkward to write (turian anatomy textbook plz?).

Handcuffs seem to be a near universal concept, she ponders as the shackles close around her wrists. )

March 2016

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